Narcissists usually pick fights to retaliate about something else. They feel like you have insulted them or harmed them in some way.
Other times, it may have nothing to do with you, you just happen to be there when they want to vent their frustrations.
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What to do if this happens to you often
The best thing you can do is ignore them. Do not give them the satisfaction of luring you into an argument.
An exception to this rule is if you have fallen in love with them, despite their narcissistic ways. In that case, try to remain calm when they vent.
Still do not let them get you involved in their argument.
Keep calm as you listen to them. This does not mean you must remain silent, however. It is possible to talk them out of this foul mood they are in.
Say things that are meaningful while they are taking their hostilities out on you. Just be careful not to get into a shouting contest with them.
Eventually, with a little patience, they will calm down.
What is the definition of a narcissist?
A narcissist is someone who is completely self-absorbed. They have a very high opinion of themselves.
The ironic thing is that they can be extremely insecure. This individual constantly needs to feel admired, especially by their loved ones and peers.
Is it impossible to have a romantic relationship with a narcissist?
Not impossible, but it takes some work. You must be a very understanding soul and be willing to accept them as they are.
You need to be aware that he or she may have an explosive temper, particularly when they feel insulted.
Whether or not you are at fault, you may incur the brunt of their anger, as we described earlier.
Are narcissists bad people?
Not necessarily. They are not incapable of being a loving mate. However, you may become frustrated with their lack of empathy for others in the world.
Along with narcissism, they can be a little vain. They can often be found primping in the mirror.
The good side to this is they care about their appearance. So, they will never embarrass you in public by looking bad.
Do narcissists enjoy fighting?
To be honest, many of them do. It could be simply a verbal fight or a physical fistfight. Especially if they are already in a foul mood.
If they happen to be in good physical shape, more than likely they will win their fight. If it is a verbal fight, they typically like to get the last word in.
How can you keep your narcissistic partner from getting into fights?
If he or she appears to be in a foul mood, avoid leaving the house with them. Stick to activities in your home and remain there until that mood fades away.
On the other hand, if they were fine when they started the evening but at some point, their mood changed, simply encourage them to remove themself from the situation.
Above all else, you must exhibit a great deal of patience with your mate.
Do narcissists tend to nitpick?
Unfortunately, yes, they do. It is one of those things you have to tolerate if you are in love with a narcissist. Their nitpicking can drive you nuts if you allow it to.
One thing you can do when they are in a nitpicky mood is walk away. Leave the house for a while if you must, but stay out of their way.
If my mate nitpicks at stupid things, does that make them a narcissist?
Not necessarily. If that is the only characteristic of a narcissist that they have, it does not mean they are narcissistic.
It would need to be accompanied by other related traits and habits.
Sometimes, a person is very insecure and nitpicks to try to compensate for this. By itself, it is not a bad thing.
Should you allow this person to continue to nitpick at you?
Eventually, you need to put your foot down. Do not allow them to abuse you even if it is only verbally.
If you are not able to convince them to stop this bad behavior, it might become necessary to end the relationship. Nobody should put up with endless nitpicking.
Then again, if it is the only narcissistic quality he or she has, you can usually choose to overlook it. In that case, simply walk away.
You might try having an honest discussion with them to say how you feel. NEVER allow them to nitpick at you in public though! That is never acceptable behavior.
Should you pursue a relationship with a narcissist?
That depends on how much patience you have. If you honestly feel that you can put up with the foul moods and nasty personality traits, go right ahead.
Just do not expect things to be easy. It will take hard work on your part to make it a successful partnership.
What if you have just started dating him or her?
You can get a good idea if someone is a narcissist pretty quickly. The above-mentioned advice is still pertinent.
However, if you find this attitude personally offensive, then terminate your relationship pronto! He or she is not likely to change.
You really do not need all that negativity around you.
What if the narcissist is your child?
As a parent, your duty is to love your child regardless. This includes if you suspect they are a narcissist.
In that case, you really need to accept them for who they are and try hard to deal with it in a positive way.
Again, you probably will never change this behavior. They are not a bad egg! Only a little self-centered. You can work with them.
Things to watch out for
There are some behaviors of a narcissist that you simply cannot put up with. For example, if they are controlling and/or enjoy intimidating you.
A narcissist does not necessarily have these horrible traits, but if they do, know that you do not have to put up with them.
If you are entering into a brand-new relationship with a narcissist, be observant from the start.
If these two traits start to manifest themselves, get out of the relationship immediately. They are not likely to ever go away.
Should you ever argue with a narcissist?
That depends on two things. Your relationship with them and what the argument is about. There are times when you have to stand your ground.
Never allow him or her to be abusive. This is the only way your partnership with this person can last.
Many happily married couples exist where one of them is a narcissist. They have disagreements but typically overcome them.
If they have done something to upset you, it is best to let them know right away. You should not let the bad behavior continue.
A personal example of such a lasting relationship
This writer’s maternal grandfather was a narcissist. He loved to pick fights with their grandmother over stupid things and was extremely self-centered.
Yet she accepted him as he was and followed the advice we have set forth in this article. They were happily married for more than fifty years. It can work out!