If you’re new to the dating scene and looking for a serious relationship, it can be difficult to understand where you’ll meet your soulmate.
Is it through an app? Through work? Should you take the plunge and try speed dating?
These are all viable ways of meeting your next soulmate, but which one of them will actually lead to marriage?
Your soulmate might be closer than you imagined. Almost 40% of people said they met their married partner through mutual friends.
Other places you can meet your future spouse include your workplace, dating apps, the gym, or even chance encounters.
Some spouses even became close after being long-time friends.
The Benefits of Dating in Your Inner Friend Circle
According to the website ReportLinker, 39% of people surveyed said they found their significant other or spouse (meaning married) through mutual friends.
If you have a close circle of friends, there’s no better way to date and find your next true match than simply asking them for advice or for introductions.
If you’re hesitant about asking your friends for some potential dates, here are some benefits to consider:
- When you’re around mutual friends, it’s easy to feel comfortable around newer people. If you’re not a social butterfly, chances are you’ve developed tight-knit relationships with your friend group. Meeting someone who is also part of your friend group makes it easier to date people and eases some of the anxiety around dating.
- There’s an added level of trust. Did you know that 93% of people trust their friends and family for brand information? If we trust our friends and family for something as simple as what milk to buy, that trust is even greater when it comes to meeting a new partner. By dating someone who your friends can vouch for, you can trust they’ve made a good decision.
- It’s easier to be open about your issues. Sometimes, it can be difficult to know who to turn to when there are problems in a relationship. Having a spouse that is bonded with your other friends allows you to gain a deeper sense of who they are. Perhaps this is why meeting someone through friends oftentimes leads to marriage.
Dating your Friends
Studies have now found that almost two-thirds of people end up marrying their friends!
The psychology behind this is a bit complex, and it can be difficult to turn your friends into a partner.
However, the numbers don’t lie, and you should remember that you can be friends with people at work, at local events, at your church, and of course within your friend circle.
Don’t be discouraged if you haven’t been able to meet someone through other avenues.
Perhaps taking a shot at dating your friend (if there is mutual interest) might just benefit your love life.
What if It Doesn’t Work Out?
Of course, not every person you meet through mutual friends is going to work out.
In fact, it can be difficult to understand how the relationship will work if you end up breaking things off.
Will you still be able to be friends with your old group? Will meetings be awkward?
It’s important to keep this in mind before making the decision to date someone your friends introduce you to.
If you want to date someone who is a mutual friend in your friend group, then you should also be open with your friends about your feelings.
Let them know when things aren’t working out, and tell them that, although you appreciate their introduction, this person just wasn’t the best fit for you.
Some things you can do to help make a breakup easier between you and someone introduced to you through mutual friends include:
- Ask friends to schedule events with this in mind
- Always hang out with friends in a group to avoid awkwardness
- Be open with your friends about why the relationship ended (Was he or she creepy? Abusive? These are all important topics to bring up)
- Make amends and tell your ex there are no hard feelings, and try to move on amicably
Meeting People on Apps
Apps are another space where you can meet your next spouse or partner.
The same survey from ReportLinker said that 8% of people met their significant others through an app.
That isn’t a big number, but it’s important to talk about apps and long-term relationships considering there are over 270 million people who use dating apps worldwide!
With so many people using dating apps, why aren’t all of them leading to marriages and long-term relationships?
That might have to do with some of the reasons people are using apps.
Although 60% of surveyors stated they wanted to use an app for a long-term relationship, another 41% said they were only looking for friendship, while 34% of single respondents were looking for hookups.
You should keep this in mind when making the transition to using apps. Some of the apps that people use most include:
- Tinder
- Bumble
- OkCupid
- Match.com
- Grinder
- Hinge
- eHarmony
How to Find a Spouse on an App
Besides practicing safety (such as meeting in public places and waiting to introduce your date to your family and to your home), there are also several steps you can take to inform your partner in a dating app you want a serious relationship.
First and foremost, putting it in your “Bio” or “About me” section is a good heads-up.
Don’t be afraid to put in your profile that you are looking for a serious relationship, since this will turn away guys (or girls) that are simply looking for a hookup.
You should also look for people who have their intentions listed on their bio. If you feel you’re being strung along, not to worry.
There are many articles online that can tell you how to deal with someone who does not want a serious relationship but continues to want to date or hook up.
The simple fix? Move on to someone who is serious!
Meeting People Through Work
Around 15% of people meet their significant others or spouses at work.
This comes as no surprise, since working in a certain area, for example as a nurse, means you have a passion for that field.
Who makes a better spouse than someone who understands your passion and can understand your daily frustrations?
Meeting people at work can be a great way to find a long-term relationship, but you must also keep in mind the potential downfalls.
If you two break up, this can make the work environment one that is toxic and awkward.
This is an even bigger problem when you are dating someone who is your boss or who you supervise.
In order to make sure your relationship works, it’s best to be honest about your relationship after things turn serious.
Many Human Resources departments have policies about dating in the workplace.
If you truly feel you want to marry a partner you met at work, it’s important to tell your Human Resources department beforehand.
You might be reassigned or transferred locations. It isn’t necessary to open up to your HR department if you’re simply dating, hanging out, or even hooking up.
However, if you try and break things off with your partner and they begin to harass you, let your HR department and other authorities know of the situation beforehand so you can remain safe.
Chance Public Encounters
Yet another 12% of people say they met their spouse through public areas such as the bar or gym.
For people who meet others in public, this is perhaps the trickiest and toughest way to seal the deal.
On apps, there is already a profile that describes your interests, likes, dislikes, and even whether or not you want to be in a serious relationship or not.
However, in public, you must ask a person all of these questions and remain safe in case they turn out to be a not-so-friendly stranger.
When meeting someone in public:
- Make sure you interact with them while sober. Although you might meet someone at a bar when you’re both intoxicated, it’s never a good idea to hook up with strangers during this vulnerable time. Instead, ask for their contact information and keep in touch.
- Schedule another meeting at the same place or a quieter venue. If you both enjoy drinking and hanging out, meeting up again at the bar or another area is a good way to have fun. However, if you want to start something serious, ask your date to meet up at another, quieter (but public area).
- Introduce them to your friends and family slowly. Remember, this is a stranger, after all, so you should take time to really know them and go on a couple of dates beforehand.
- Be upfront about your situation. Are you at a bar to find a hookup or are you open to a relationship? The sooner you both talk about this, the better.
Events of Mutual Interest
Finally, 9% of people met their significant other at a sporting event, hobby, or religious event.
This is a slightly better approach to meeting someone in public that’s not at a bar.
For one, you already have mutual interests and know that the other is open to doing things you love to do (if you were to ever get into a relationship).
In addition, meeting someone with mutual interests allows there to be a level of comfort in your relationship.
Meeting someone at a mutual event, such as a church, also makes it easier to be open with your new partner about things such as religion that can play a significant role in your relationship.
Most of all, this is one of the most fun ways to meet someone new!
Whether it’s your local garlic or avocado festival, a carnival, or even a ghost hunting trip, wouldn’t it be nice to know there’s someone out there that loves the same hobbies you do?
Final Thoughts
There are almost an infinite number of ways to meet a new spouse or long-term partner.
One of the best ways to meet a new partner is to simply meet them through other friends or even to start dating your friend.
We don’t recommend this if there aren’t any mutual feelings between the two of you.
If these methods fail, there is also the possibility of finding people through bars, clubs, other events, and even online!
The most important thing to consider is to be open about your goals with your partner. If marriage is the end goal, there’s no shame in being open about this.
