Dating is difficult enough, let alone dating someone who is narcissistic and only focused on what is good for themselves.
If you believe you are dating a narcissist, they will likely loathe receiving the silent treatment.
Many narcissists hate receiving the silent treatment from anyone, especially a romantic partner, as they will likely begin to feel unable to control and dictate the situation any longer.
Understanding how a narcissist operates can help you to better navigate your own relationship.
Table of Contents
What is a narcissist?
A narcissist is an individual who is self-serving and oftentimes unable to act selflessly or generously for others without receiving something in return.
Narcissistic individuals may believe that they are smarter than others and that they are, ultimately, better than those around them.
If you are ever around a narcissist, you may find it grating to listen to them compliment themselves and brag about themselves incessantly, which can get old fast.
A narcissist may find it challenging to empathize with others and they may not feel any understanding or sympathy for anyone else.
Narcissists often use others in order to advance themselves in life, whether it is through financial means, support, or even a sense of security.
Those who struggle with narcissism may find it difficult to care much about anyone else other than themselves, even if they proclaim themselves to be loving and caring.
If you have ever dated a narcissist, you may also feel as though they are extremely manipulative, charismatic, and at times, even jealous.
Because a narcissist often lives in a world they have created to revolve only around them, they work even harder to manipulate others in their lives.
Being a puppet master is not uncommon for those who are narcissistic or struggle with narcissistic behaviors and tendencies.
What is the silent treatment?
The silent treatment is as a period of time in which an individual ignores another that they are closely connected to, either platonically or romantically.
The silent treatment is not uncommon when an individual is upset, angered, or even completely betrayed, especially if they feel betrayed by someone they love and trust.
When someone gives another a silent treatment, they are usually attempting to show their feelings and how deeply they have been affected and hurt by the other.
In the case of giving a narcissist a silent treatment, you may find it more difficult than with someone who does not share the same qualities and characteristics as a classical narcissist.
Why do narcissists despise the silent treatment?
A narcissist hates being ignored more than anything. After all, for a narcissist, the world does indeed, revolve around them.
When someone gives a narcissist a silent treatment, the narcissist is likely to lash out in anger or respond with a cruel and unjust response.
A narcissist does not want to feel ignored, so they may act out even more in order to get the attention they are seeking and craving, especially if they believe they are being given the silent treatment in a relationship.
Signs that a narcissist is upset over the silent treatment
If you are friends with a narcissist or dating one, you may notice that they are upset if you begin giving them the silent treatment or ignoring them.
Some signs that a narcissist is upset over being given the cold shoulder might include:
- Increased desperation to communicate with you via text, phone calls, or even in person
- A change in attitude
- Increased agitation and irritation due to not being able to get their own way
- The silent treatment in return. A narcissist may attempt to ignore you in order to get your attention again and to get you to stop giving them the silent treatment.
Should I give a narcissist the silent treatment?
While it is always an option to give someone the silent treatment whenever you believe it is justified, it is not always useful or helpful.
If you want to get to the bottom of an issue in your relationship or if you are trying to attempt to remedy a situation, giving anyone a silent treatment will not likely result in the outcome you desire.
When should I give someone the silent treatment?
Choosing to give someone the silent treatment is not always easy, especially if you live with them or work around them.
When you choose to give someone the silent treatment, you are removing the option of open and honest communication from the table.
While you can give someone the silent treatment when they have caused you to feel upset or angry, it may not help you to achieve any goals you have in mind for yourself and the relationship you are in with someone else.
How can I tell if I am dating a narcissist?
It is not always easy to tell if you are dating someone who is a narcissist or someone who has narcissistic characteristics, unfortunately.
However, once you are familiar with how a narcissist will act and behave, even when around those he or she claims to love and care about, you can determine if your partner is a narcissist.
One of the best ways to determine if someone you are dating is a narcissist is by simple observation.
Spending time with someone, having conversations with them, and simply getting to know them will provide you with valuable insight into their personality type as well as the type of quirks they may have when it comes to behaviors and narcissistic characteristics.
When you are getting to know someone and you are just starting to date, ask questions of your partner to learn more about their childhood, upbringing, and how they have evolved and grown as an adult.
If you notice that your date rarely asks about you, your hobbies and interests, as well as your own life but cannot stop talking about their own, they may tend to be a bit more narcissistic than others.
While it is not always an indication that an individual is a narcissist if they cannot stop talking about themselves, it is typically a sign that they may be more full of themselves than the average person.
What are the signs of a narcissist in everyday life?
Spotting the signs of a narcissist in everyday life is not always easy, simple, or straightforward.
After all, the true narcissist lives as a chameleon and can be extremely good at hiding their emotions and true intentions, even in their closest of relationships.
Looking for certain signs and behaviors that a classical narcissist will display can help you to get to know those who are involved in your own everyday life a bit better.
Some signs to watch for that may indicate that someone in your life is a narcissist or that they are displaying narcissistic characteristics include:
- Noticing he or she is only interested in talking about themselves
- He or she rarely asks about the well-being or interest of others and is often too focused on themselves
- Little to no regard for the feelings of others
- Lack of empathy and sympathy when listening to others or when being confided in by others
- Inability to relate or show emotions that correlate with the emotions being described or shared by others
- Demonstrating a lack of empathy with sarcasm or dismissive behaviors
Is it possible for a narcissist to change?
In some instances, all individuals can display narcissistic behaviors and tendencies, but it does not mean the person is a narcissist or is dealing with NPD, or narcissistic personality disorder.
In most cases, those who struggle with narcissistic tendencies are doing just that, rather than battling an entire personality disorder.
In order for someone who is a narcissist to change, they will first need to acknowledge and understand what type of behaviors they are participating in that is causing others to view them as narcissistic.
This step will be the toughest for a narcissist, as they may find it more challenging than others to self-actualize and realize what behaviors are narcissistic.
If someone wants to change, they can do so by immersing themselves in self-reflection and self-awareness exercises to help better understand their own actions and behaviors.
Working with counselors, therapists, and other professionals who specialize in helping those who have narcissistic tendencies can also go a long way for those who want long-term change.
How can I determine if I should stay with someone who is a narcissist?
Dating a narcissist or living with a narcissist is not always easy, especially if you were not aware of their narcissistic behaviors and tendencies before getting to know them better.
If you want to know if you should stay with a narcissist, it is important to consider how they act and whether or not their behaviors are obvious, nefarious, and/or targeted toward you.
You will only know if it is possible to stay with a narcissist after being with them for an extended period of time.
Dating a narcissist long-term can be tricky, and confusing at times, especially if you feel lied to or at times, even betrayed.
If you have a gut feeling that your relationship cannot be repaired or that the trust bond between you and your partner has been completely destroyed, it may be best to cut your losses and to move on as quickly as possible.
Why is it difficult to leave a narcissist?
If you are dating a narcissist or someone who exhibits numerous narcissistic behaviors, you may find it more challenging to leave the relationship than any other relationship you have ever been in and experienced.
A narcissist is a master manipulator and often takes pride in their ability to live as the puppet master of those who are in their lives.
While in one moment you may feel strong enough to leave the relationship and begin living on your own independently, the next moment your partner may have convinced you to forget about any of your own plans.
Knowing how to identify manipulative behavior is essential when dealing with a narcissist, whether you are doing so as a friend or as a romantic partner.
Knowing how to identify a narcissist can help you to steer clear from dating one or spending time around one in a romantic or committed manner in the future.
When dealing with a narcissist in the present, sometimes, silence is often the best weapon available.
The use of silence can also help you to expose the narcissistic nature and behavior of your partner, which can help you to determine if the situation and relationship are truly right for you.