Imagine finding the one person you were meant to be with – only to lose them, because you didn’t realize how your actions were hurting and killing them inside. Even the most heartfelt apologies don’t seem to be enough to get them back.
It’s too late to repair what’s broken because you were either too naïve or indifferent to the fact that you, the very person who was supposed to look after their heart, were the one who shattered it.
If you feel like your love story is approaching this tragic conclusion, you can do your part by being more aware of and attentive to your significant other’s needs. Keep reading to find out how to save your relationship.
1. He’s Spending Less Time With You
Most people often cope with a broken heart by avoiding the individual who caused it. If you’ve broken your partner’s heart, they’ll always seek new reasons to spend time with their friends or relatives and avoid seeing you in an attempt to take a break from you and heal their heart.
A man who has been hurt by you will find it more difficult to spend time with you.
2. He’s Unusually Silent
If you’re with someone who has suddenly become quiet and shy, know that something drastic must have caused this abrupt shift in behavior. When a person’s heart is hurt, they aren’t very verbal about it. Instead, most people find it easier to bottle up their feelings and become steely and silent.
Consider what could have gone wrong by looking back. Do you believe you said or did anything hurtful? Accept their silence if they’re still not prepared to discuss the heartbreak, and wait for the right moment.
3. He Doesn’t Laugh at Your Jokes
How does he react to your sense of humor – especially when you know all too well that your jokes aren’t that good? If the person you love laughs at them anyway, it shows he just genuinely wants to make you happy.
If he’s not chuckling at your bad jokes, it’s a clear warning sign that something is off. Think of it this way: if the reverse was true, and you weren’t laughing at his jokes, it would mean there was trouble in paradise.
4. They Always Wear a Scowl on Their Face
A person’s eyes, as the portals to the soul, can reveal a great deal about their mental state and their emotions. Your significant other might be sending you a warning or message through their eyes that shows that they’re upset or even devastated, but they don’t want to say it out loud.
Just because he isn’t communicating his feelings doesn’t mean he isn’t feeling them altogether. In fact, there’s a good chance he’s feeling so much that he’s decided to bottle everything up quietly.
5. He’s Become Withdrawn and Disconnected
If your partner has become withdrawn and detached, you’ll notice quite a lot of signs he is giving that show he’s mad at you. These can range from failing to acknowledge your existence while right next to you to behaving as if nothing is wrong, before they eventually just stop caring about you altogether.
His withdrawal can hurt, but remember he is hurt too.
6. You Get Cold Replies
This one is a classic. Most of us are awkward at confrontations and emotional stand-offs, so we do what we do best: a text war, instead of talking about everything verbally.
However, this time around, he’s actually so hurt that he has decided to just give you curt, one-word replies – or none at all – to essay-length texts.
7. They Avoided Voicing Their Emotions
Every relationship’s honeymoon stage is a time when partners feel free to be themselves and tell their beloved about their lives, their memories, what makes them feel good, and what spins their wheels.
However, there are moments when they unexpectedly stop being transparent and clam up because they’ve been hurt or humiliated – because of something their partner did or didn’t do at some stage in their relationship.
8. They’ve Become Too Emotional
Most individuals who’ve been hurt by their significant other lack the confidence to share their feelings for fear of causing problems in their relationship. Instead, their emotions will surface at the most awkward times and for the most insignificant of reasons – and it’ll be only a matter of time before they erupt.
If your partner is heartbroken, there’s a good chance they’ll exhibit weirdly violent outbursts at seemingly normal things due to their pent-up anger and hurt.
9. They Haven’t Spoken to You in a Long Time
If you guys have trouble saying what you want to say, there’s a good chance your relationship is taking a turn towards the worst. Even though he might miss you, the grief you have given him is so big that he finds it hard to wrap his head around it.
If that’s the case, it makes complete sense that you haven’t spoken in a long time.
10. They Tell You You’ve Hurt Him
Regardless of how a woman wants to understand or analyze his words, a man generally says what he means and means what he says. So, if he goes out of his way to tell you how much you’ve hurt him rather than allowing his ego to suffocate his feelings, as men sometimes do, know that you’ve genuinely broken his heart.
11. He’s Been Overeating or Drinking
Women do it, and men do it too. If he’s heartbroken and really feeling down in the dumps, he might be eating his feelings. He may have fallen off his diet or even started to binge on oily, fatty foods he typically avoided like the plague.
Alcohol abuse is a common way people deal with their problems and negative thoughts. They drink until they’re absolutely hammered, because they don’t want to think about the problems in their life.
You’ve left a void in him, and he’s trying to fill it whichever way he can.
12. He Has Joined a Gym
Your man might have joined the gym or has been going much more than usual. Has he started to do excessive bench presses or even subscribed to the platinum service at the best gym in town? Contrary to previous instances, he’s actually making it to the gym and getting absolutely destroyed every day.
What he can’t talk about, he’s taking out on the bags.
13. He’s Dating Every Girl in Town
If the gates of his house have been swinging like a revolving door, he might be sleeping his way to therapy. Your behavior has torn him up enough for him to be trying to find somebody else – someone new, and someone better to make it up to himself.
He’s using women as a coping mechanism and dating people you’d typically never even see him with.
14. He Makes Sad Social Media Posts
Today, people rarely talk to their significant other; they just talk around them on social media. They call quits at the first sign of trouble, and if they really want to say something they make a social media post about it.
Your partner might be doing that too; he might be posting quotes about women being heartbreakers or how men are foolish lovesick puppies.
How Can You Make Him Feel Better
If you see him displaying any of the above signs, he needs you to make it up to him – and fast. Tell him that his feelings are important to you, and that you value his honesty and the way he displays his true self without the mask or the walls. Allow him to have faith in you once more.
Don’t leave him depressed and lonely while attempting to conceal the misery you’ve caused him. It’s important to recognize how he’s feeling and why he’s feeling that way.
1. Give Him Space
Most men get mad – and end up opening up by themselves. They need no prompting or extra love. If he’s tired of you and asks for some time alone, oblige, and let him know he can have all the time in the world.
He’ll talk when he is ready.
2. Communicate Effectively
Isn’t it about time you spoke with them and found out what’s really going on? Even the most difficult problems in a relationship can be resolved through effective communication.
Sit him down in a comfortable environment without any distractions. Smile, be polite and ask him if he is ready to talk. If he is, that’s great – but if not, give him more time. Some things can’t be rushed.
These 13 Tips for Communicating Effectively With your Partner might help you get back on track.
3. Find Out the Cause of the Problem
Figure out what went wrong in the first place and what you could do about it. It’s best to set up a proper discussion and let everything out in the open.
Hearing him talk about his problem areas with you can help you better reach a logical conclusion about your relationship and the natural next step.
4. Let Him Cry It Out
Some people are unable to share their feelings for fear of breaking up with their partner. Let your partner know that it’s fine to weep and share their emotions with you. Show him that you’re there to listen and understand whatever is troubling them.
5. Listen Intently
If your partner seems troubled, better to give them time to find the desire to speak to you about what’s troubling them on their own rather than pestering them constantly. However, if you know how to get them to speak up while also allowing them to hide in their silence, go for it. What matters is that you demonstrate that you care and that their thoughts are relevant to you.
Be sure to listen intently to whatever he says. When he shares his feelings and bares himself to you, show him you care by paying attention, responding calmly, and not by actively listening to what he has to say.
6. Apologize Sincerely
If you’ve figured out what has hurt him, it is time to make amends. Apologize if you know what you did to earn his hostile and dismissive responses towards you. It won’t hurt to ask him what you’ve done that has hurt him. If you are really at fault, accept whatever he throws at you with a caring and apologetic spirit – and be sincere.
7. Understand that There Are Always Rough Patches
It takes more than love and loyalty to keep a healthy relationship going. It’s important to have the courage to face the negative aspects of life, stick with your beloved in the hardest moments, and be compassionate enough when it matters the most.
8. Remind Him of Happier Times
If he’s heartbroken but still with you, remind him how good you had it by showing him old pictures of the two of you doing fun things or talking about times that you miss. The nostalgic wind might just turn the tides of his heart in your direction.
9. Make Kind Gestures
Loving someone can hurt sometimes, and healing from the hurt can take some time. Speed up the recovery by showing him that you’re the same person he fell in love with and make small, kind gestures to make him feel special and more loved.
10. Make Changes in Your Behavior
If your relationship has been suffering for a while now, your behavior might be to blame. If you’ve figured out what is making the relationship suffer, a good place to start would be to become a better person for your man and your relationship.
The Bottom Line
No relationship is perfect, but the best ones make sure that no matter what happens both partners stick together. Giving a relationship effort and a good try shows the mettle of a romantic person.
If you consider yourself a romantic, try to become the person your significant other would want to be with. If you do, you’ll succeed in creating a strong relationship with your partner.