When you think of loving yourself and accepting who you truly are, you will likely associate the thoughts with a positive emotion or expression.
However, you may know someone who seems to love themselves a little too much.
This person may even be you. If you’re wondering if it is possible to love yourself too much, the answer is, at times, yes.
In some cases, loving yourself too much may be an indicator of a deeper emotional issue that requires your attention.
Other times, your self-esteem may be too high, or you may be struggling with undiagnosed NPD – Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
Knowing what you need and how to love yourself in a healthy way can help you to find balance.
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Can you love yourself too much?
While it is essential to love yourself fully and completely, it is possible to love yourself too much, especially if you are attempting to ignore other areas or aspects of your life.
Loving yourself too much may sound like an oxymoron, but it can become truly invasive and problematic for those suffering from disorders such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) as well as high self-esteem.
Is there a term for individuals who love themselves too much?
Yes, there can be multiple terms for an individual who loves themselves too much.
In some cases, a person may be struggling with extremely high self-esteem, which can quickly interfere with relationships and everyday life.
Those who have additional struggles regarding self-identity may also be struggling with NPD.
How do I know if I love myself too much?
It is not always easy to tell if you love yourself too much. After all, we are taught to give ourselves plenty of love, care, and self-acceptance from an early age.
If you believe you may be loving yourself too much, it is best to keep an eye on your habits as well as your behavioral patterns, especially as they pertain to the view you have of yourself as well as the relationships you have with others and the outside world.
Some indicators that you may love yourself too much might include:
- Experiencing extremely high self-esteem. This may mean believing you are always right, or that you are more important than others. You may find it difficult to listen to others or to empathize with those around you, especially if you are too busy thinking about making your own plans or talking about your own life.
- Ignoring your relationships: Do you make time for your loved ones on a regular basis? Are you maintaining a balance in your life when it comes to socializing and spending time with your partner, children, family, and even your friends? Ignoring your relationships to focus only on yourself because you view yourself as more important may be an indication of an elevated level of self-esteem.
- Difficulties socializing: If you are unable to be humble, kind, and socially aware when you are in public due to your excessively high self-esteem, you may have trouble socializing. Experiencing difficulties while socializing is not unusual for anyone who struggles with maintaining a balance when it comes to their self-esteem.
- Lack of motivation and/or improvement: If you are unable to improve upon yourself and find no reason to do so, even with objective information, you may be struggling with your self-esteem. Those who believe they are perfect or that there is no need for improvement will find it difficult to ever challenge themselves, thus keeping them in the same position and space for the rest of their lives.
- Struggling to accept criticism: When someone is unable to listen to criticism and they have a hard time understanding another person’s perspective, they may have extremely high self-esteem. This can result in a lack of self-awareness that is frustrating for surrounding loved ones.
Is there a difference between self-care and loving yourself too much?
Yes. Self-care is the act of providing love and care for your body, mind, and soul.
Loving yourself too much can be an indicator of a deeper unresolved trauma, issue, or even an undiagnosed condition, such as NPD.
Knowing the difference between self-care and loving yourself too much is crucial to avoid being afraid to show yourself the proper amount of love.
Acts of self-care may include, but are not limited to:
- Planning vacations and exploring activities that bring you a personal sense of joy
- Taking time away from work to relax and decompress
- Spending the day shopping or at a spa where you are free from stress and have the ability to unwind and relax
- Cooking a 3-course meal for yourself, even when you have no one to socialize with or entertain
- Cleaning your home and decluttering your space to help improve your focus and your mental wellbeing
Some examples of loving yourself too much might include the following:
- Focusing on only yourself in conversation, when around others, and even when you are in public
- Thinking of only what you want and the desires that you have for your own life, rather than also considering the desires of your loved ones
- Interrupting and/or talking over others while they are attempting to speak or share what is on their minds
- Bragging about yourself in front of others to make yourself look or feel better
- Spending more time and money on yourself instead of committing any time to those who love you the most
It is important to note that with both self-care acts and the examples of loving yourself too much, both are not objective.
Because every individual is unique in their own way, it is too difficult to gauge the world of self-care and loving yourself too much and should only be done on a case-by-case basis.
Will others know if I love myself too much?
In most cases, it will likely be fairly obvious when someone is showing themselves too much love, especially if they are doing so in public.
If you are constantly bragging, showing off, or drawing attention to yourself, others are bound to notice at some point.
How can I stop focusing so much on myself?
If you are struggling with focusing too much on yourself and you know it, you are already making progress.
Simply admitting that you may be focusing too much on loving yourself can help you to become more aware of your actions and regular behavioral patterns.
When you are aware of how you live and treat others, you can begin to make positive changes in your everyday life.
How can I share the love I have inside me with others?
If you want to share the love you have for yourself with others, you will need to truly get to why you may not accept yourself as you are right now.
Spending money, purchasing clothing, cosmetic surgery, homes, luxury vehicles, and accumulating wealth are not the answer if you are struggling to love and accept yourself.
Starting down the journey of accepting yourself through various forms of therapy, meditation, and exercise can go a long way if you want to begin living your life in a more giving way.
The more time you spend focusing on others and giving back, the less time you will feel that you are preoccupied with your own self and self-esteem.
Is it possible to find a balance in how much I love myself?
Yes, it is always possible to find a balance in how much you love yourself, especially once you are aware of triggers that may be causing you to act out or draw attention to yourself.
Once you realize and accept that loving yourself too much is not always a positive experience, you can begin to make the necessary changes you need to in your own life and with your own relationships.
How can I find balance in how much I love myself?
Loving yourself is not an inherently bad thing. In fact, it is healthy and extremely encouraged in most cases.
However, if you are struggling with your self-esteem or even another condition, you may be wondering how you can go about finding balance if you do love yourself too much.
Use the following tips to help find balance if you are struggling with high self-esteem or another condition such as NPD:
- Congratulate yourself for recognizing that your behavioral patterns are not working out in your favor.
- Accept that you are struggling and that it is normal to do so, whether you are struggling with a condition or your self-esteem.
- Think of the people who mean the most to you and why they matter so much to you in your daily life.
- Consider your job, career trajectory, as well as any life plans and goals you have in mind and why you may be struggling to tackle them head-on.
- Reflect on how you may be showing off or sharing a negative side of your personality with others, which may be turning them away.
- Dedicate more time to family, friends, and loved ones, rather than solely focusing on yourself.
- Budget and plan to avoid overspending, especially on yourself, as you work through loving yourself too much.
- Explore new hobbies and passions that are a source of joy to you.
- Spend time in nature and away from materialistic virtues and goals. The more time you spend in nature with the world around you, the less likely you are to feel wrapped up in your own ego and self-image.
- Consider the option of seeking counseling or therapy, both individually as well as in a group session with others who may be experiencing similar issues.
Does loving myself too much indicate other issues I am avoiding or not addressing?
In many cases, yes. Loving yourself too much can often indicate other issues that you are either avoiding altogether or not attempting to address due to not understanding them.
If you believe you are loving yourself too much, but you have realized that your behavior has turned people away and come between your relationships, jobs, and other life choices, it may be time to make some changes in your everyday life.
How can I get help for loving myself too much?
Getting help for loving yourself too much is possible by eating healthily, getting adequate exercise, meditating, and spending plenty of time around family members and friends who love you.
It is also possible to get help for loving yourself too much by seeking help from a medical professional such as a psychiatrist or therapist.
Working with individual or group counseling sessions can help you to truly home in on the issues you are struggling with most when it comes to your own self-image and self-esteem.